Ricky Martin struggled to enjoy his early career success as hiding his sexuality left him “sad” and “depressed”.
The Puerto Rican singer released his first English language album in 1999 and became an international superstar with hits like Livin’ la Vida Loca and She Bangs earning him the title of the King of Latin Pop.
Despite his massive success, Ricky told PROUD RADIO on Apple Music he couldn’t enjoy the period as keeping his sexuality a secret left him in a deeply unhappy state.
“I wasn’t living to the fullest. I was sad. I was depressed,” Ricky explained. “I would walk on stage to perform because that was the only way I could balance my emotion is to snap out of this heavy sadness that I was moving in. And then actually there came a moment that I said, we need to stop.”
It was during a world tour that the hitmaker finally decided to step away from the spotlight, and he halted the jaunt and returned home.
“I said, I can’t. I can’t do this. I need to go home. I need silence. I need to cry. I need to be angry,” he recalled. “I put things in order and still I was not ready to come out, but I was open with everyone around me, but I just didn’t have the strength to make it public.
“It was a very important link that I was trying to avoid. And then when I really did my work, spiritual work, I got to the place I was fighting as I was writing my book between saying, am I gay? Am I bisexual? Am I gay? Am I bisexual?”
Finally he came to the conclusion, and with the weight lifted, could be happy once again.
“Then I said, Rick, you are a very fortunate, homosexual, man. You are gay,” he smiled. “And I wrote it and I pressed send, and then I cried like crazy. And I’ve been super happy ever since.”